So, it’s nearly the end of May. I cut my capsule wardrobe short by about a week because I wanted to wear some of the things I picked up at a clothes swap a few days ago.
How did it go?
It went great. I took one jumper out of the suitcase, but apart from that I dressed exclusively from my capsule wardrobe and didn’t miss anything at all.
To be honest, it wasn’t a big a deal as I made it out to be. I didn’t feel restricted, and my style didn’t look or feel that different (just more refined, I guess). It did make dressing less stressful, but it also meant I needed to do laundry regularly.
What did I learn?
- What I’m wearing doesn’t have as much impact on my happiness as I thought it did.
- It’s easy not to buy new things once you fall out of the habit of doing so.
- I don’t enjoy wearing red jeans. I just feel too self-conscious (which is weird, because I wear a lot of bright colours and patterns).
- I don’t have as much to say about clothes and style as I do about mental health?
But more importantly
CBT is making me realise that a lot of my anxious thoughts are about me looking wrong, or wearing the wrong thing. In the past I have tried to solve looking wrong by going shopping. But what I think looks good one day will inevitably look wrong at some point, and I’ll need new clothes again. The answer then, isn’t to change what I look like but change how I think.
Basically, as fun as this was, I’m not sure I’ll be using capsule wardrobes again because I don’t think my problem with clothes is actually anything to do with clothes. Which is an interesting thing to realise, after literal YEARS of thinking I would just be happy if I had a small coordinated wardrobe of things where everything fit. I’ve actually not even thought that much about clothes and shopping since I’ve been on meds and focused on liking myself. How fascinating.